Grief Articles and Resources
Grief Articles and Resources
Early Grief/Recent Bereavement/Living with Grief.
Hello Friends and New friends-subscribers!
A big hug, I see you. Life has grown around my grief, but in the calm, less stressful periods of life, there are sudden waves that consume me.
Grief was relegated and boxed when I moved from one rollercoaster to another. So now, it tends to erupt and break free.
What happens when grief for one person is smothered by the need to care for another? Containing grief through surgery, healing, chemo-, radiotherapy and administering probate. It’s like an intermittent howl, muted. You know it’s lurking, powerless, unsure when it jumps you.
And yet, in the most unlikely place - ‘Wandavision’ the Marvel TV series, something clicked for me.
Articles by Victoria at Carer Mentor
Personal Reflection & Resources: life grows around grief.
‘Grief is messy. It’s not a tidy five-stage path.’
Personal Reflection: Grief is love persevering
Table of Contents: Articles by other Authors
Early Grief. The Long Goodbye.
Grief, for every individual, is a unique experience and journey
Navigating Bereavement and Grief
Moving stories of legacy and inspiration
Death Doula & End of Life.
A compassionate discussion about being a Death Doula: ‘Guided By Joy: A Conversation with Alua Arthur’. On being a death doula, empathy v. compassion, toxic self-reliance, boundaries, celebrating celebrations, and so much more! By Jane Ratcliffe and Alua Arthur
The 4 Things You Must Say Before You Die by Thank you Jessica Nordell and Brenda Hartman at Publication: Who We Are To Each Other
Early Grief. The Long Goodbye.
The impact of dementia and long term illness. The grief we feel before they’ve gone. ‘The Long Goodbye. Navigating my parents' dementia, and my brain's attempt to let it consume me.’ By Anna De La Cruz at Publication: GenXandwich
‘Dementia is a thief that steals from us all’. By Amy Brown at Publication: Living in 3D: Divorce, Dementia and Destiny
The paradox of blessing-burden and grief-joy. There are so many quotes I wanted to share from this! ‘Exploring the blessings/burdens of this season. Catastrophising with my cup half full.’ By Sarah Coomber at Publication: Sandwich Season.
Kristina’s vulnerably raw memoir that shares what happens after her husband’s diagnosed with breast cancer. ‘How it Began’ By Kristina Adams Waldorf, MD at Publication: After He Said Cancer.
The beautiful writing of Bess and Jakes journey. Quote: ‘Every bonus hour has become the golden hour. We haven’t been around as long as Newgrange, but it feels like, just by getting to this solstice, we’re a monument to something. Maybe a monument to how much love can do. We’re beautiful in this light.’ ‘How the light gets in: a solstice at the border of life and death. The fire in each of us, on the shortest day of the year’ By Bess Stillman at Publication: Everything is an Emergency.
Navigating grief in life. ‘Intentionally Building Resilience One Day at a Time’ By Anne at Publication: The Future Widow
Bearing witness to the decline and feeling the crescendo of grief. ‘When Death is Slow to Come.’ Finding Gratitude in the Midst of Pain By Jeff Scott
Grief, for every individual, is a unique experience and journey.
I recommend reading Debbie’s article and the comments. They highlight how no two experiences are the same because no two people or relationships are alike.
I appreciated Debbie’s article because many people expected me to be sobbing in grief, but I was relieved: Dad was finally released from his pain & diseased body. Then, grief was deprioritised by more caregiving and complicated by traumatic memories of falls and hospital discharges.
Please don't say "Sorry for your loss". A complicated relationship with my dad has led to complicated grief. By
Navigating Bereavement and Grief
A poignant essay. ‘What I Learned in My First Year as a Widow. Gratitude is how you get through grief.’ Mary Roblyn Publication: Wri/ter Interrupted.
My husband died a year ago from Alzheimer’s Disease. Right afterward, I wanted to go with him. Gratitude Graces Loss. Unconscious Intimacy By
at Publication Betwixt & Between Proxy.Quote: ‘Be that as it may, there remains a constant sadness in me that I don’t think will ever go away. My life is unequivocally changed - and it wasn’t a change I wanted or planned for. I miss him more than I could have imagined.’ ‘Three Years a Widow. It doesn’t Seem Possible.’ By Janice Walton at Publication: Ageing Well.
Quote: As a fellow writer said when writing about her husband’s death, “our love is breathing still.” Even though my husband of 60 years is physically gone, constants remain in life - maybe, our love is breathing still - just differently.’ ‘Walk in the Woods’ By Janice Walton at Publication: Ageing Well
Referenced by Janice. I Buried Him. Our love is breathing still.By Ramona Grigg at Publication: Constant Commoner
Opening our hearts and minds to everyone. Grief is an individual experience but for some they are suffocated or marginalised. ‘Feeling suffocated? A social justice approach to grief and loss means that we must attend to the many ways that the marginalized are cast aside.’ By Dina Bell-Laroche at Publication: The Grieving Place. Stories of Love and Loss
A beautiful poem ‘Death came’ Tahia Sherebanou Fakhri at Publication: Contemplations
Navigating feelings after a recent bereavement. ‘Don't let guilt steal your grief.’ By Amy Brown Publication: Living in 3D: Divorce, Dementia and Destiny
Quote: ‘I had the sense of a circle being brought to completion, of a contract having been honoured.’ A parting gift. Being with my mother at the end. by Jody Day at Publications: Gateway Elderwomen.
This is Disenfranchised Grief. YouTube video The lost tribe of childless women by Jody Day at TEDxHull June 2 2017.
Reframing our relationship with grief. ‘It is clear to me now that I was fearful of grief because I had no framework to make sense of the experience of death, and I had no models for how to cope effectively with overwhelming emotion’ An Invitation to Grieve Fearlessly. Grief can be frightening, but there is nothing to fear’.By Amber Groomes,Ph.D. at Publication: Dr. Amber_Writes’.
Learning how we can be like a good friend to our-grieving-selves. Meet Your Grief With Self-Compassion How I've used self-compassion while grieving, and how you can too. By Amber Groomes,Ph.D. at Publication: Dr. Amber_Writes’
‘Women are designed to Howl if we're not howling are we even healing?’ By Danusia Malina-Derben at Publication: Parents Who Think.
Quote: ‘These days in my mind, grief looks like a circle of people—all different ages and sizes of Amanda—sitting around, each passing a parcel from person to person. It seems now that when grief had brought someone closure, they passed it on to the next Amanda who was ready.’ ‘The Alchemization of Grief A New Orleans cab driver helps me grieve my daughter’ by Amanda B. Hinton at Publication: The Editing Spectrum
‘A keening ceremony Finding the doorway into a shared experience of grief and love’ by Nici Harrison at Publication: Grief Balm
‘Somehow the loss keeps happening An exploration of time, felt as a pulse, rather than a period’ By Nici Harrison Publication: Grief Balm
Quote: “AHHH, I BUILT A HOME FOR MY GRIEF TO LIVE IN. “7 Years of Grief” is the home of my acute ache.’ ‘DOES SADNESS BELONG ON THE PAGE FOREVER?’ By Leann Burch Writing at Publication: Leann Burch Writing
Quote: ‘We don’t return, we don’t pretend, and we don’t just move on. We cannot return to our previous grief free days because we aren’t the same anymore, how could we be after such loss?’ ‘Give Grief a Seat’. Making space for our pain. By Laurita Gorman | MSW SEP at Publication: Wildly Unraveled.
‘Quote’ ‘There was nothing I could do to stop the vortex of chaos, and nothing for me to hold onto and take refuge. The only thing I was able to do – in Alan Watts’s words – “to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.”'Be Present and Dance with Grief. On moving forward when everything falls apart'. By Bonnie Tai. Publication: 'Let's Just Be'
Moving stories of legacy and inspiration
‘Happy Birthday my eternal child. 24th June ... Happy Birthday to a child long gone, a child ever here’. By
Grief Empathy is painful
When ‘Til Death Do Us Part Happens’. Another widow finds herself suddenly alone By
at ‘Can I Do It Alone’. writes a beautifully empathetic piece. Many of us, I’m sure, have felt the resurgence of grief on special occasions, but I think it’s particularly potent when we feel empathy for someone else. Thank you for this, Sue.
Resources:
‘Helping Children Process Death and Cope with Grief, While you're still trying to figure it out yourself’ by Anna De La Cruz shares her experience and some resources.
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