I think your response was great - gave a huge amount of information but also empathy. The bottom line is that more and more of us are going to sleep walk into caring and many will be in 'denial'. I am also a fan of 'tough love' and feel that sometimes one has to be harsh with the person/people being cared for, if they will not accept outside help such as a cleaner for example. No one should be driven to breaking point by caring but so many are. I have 3 close friends whom I feel are sleep walking into caring - one for her father, one for her parents in law, and another who has serious health issues, for her mother as her father died in January. All I can do is try to prepare them and pass on similar information the way in which you have done so for your friend . It is very very hard to negotiate the way through available help and find the right kind of help. It also varies from area to area which is where a local Carers Group can offer invaluable support. Sadly once one sleep walks into caring, it generally gets worse rather than better, with more and more demands being made. Boundries are very very important but hard to impose if an emergency situation flares up.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I'm glad your friends have you to support them. Yes, things become a lot tougher in crises. I hope sharing info & spreading awareness like this, can give people a heads-up, to make informed choices for themselves and with their loved ones, to prepare themselves. Feel free to share this letter if you think it can help your friends.
I think your response was great - gave a huge amount of information but also empathy. The bottom line is that more and more of us are going to sleep walk into caring and many will be in 'denial'. I am also a fan of 'tough love' and feel that sometimes one has to be harsh with the person/people being cared for, if they will not accept outside help such as a cleaner for example. No one should be driven to breaking point by caring but so many are. I have 3 close friends whom I feel are sleep walking into caring - one for her father, one for her parents in law, and another who has serious health issues, for her mother as her father died in January. All I can do is try to prepare them and pass on similar information the way in which you have done so for your friend . It is very very hard to negotiate the way through available help and find the right kind of help. It also varies from area to area which is where a local Carers Group can offer invaluable support. Sadly once one sleep walks into caring, it generally gets worse rather than better, with more and more demands being made. Boundries are very very important but hard to impose if an emergency situation flares up.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I'm glad your friends have you to support them. Yes, things become a lot tougher in crises. I hope sharing info & spreading awareness like this, can give people a heads-up, to make informed choices for themselves and with their loved ones, to prepare themselves. Feel free to share this letter if you think it can help your friends.