Hello, Dear Reader! Welcome to our new Carer Mentor community members!
I’m Victoria. You can read why I’m publishing Carer Mentor here: Who Started Carer Mentor and Why?
In short, after a career climbing the corporate ladder and 18 relocations across 10 countries, I made a head-heart-gut-aligned decision to help my Mum care for my Dad. He had a litany of health issues that were destabilised by a major hospitalisation in 2015: congestive heart failure and rheumatoid arthritis were compounded with a diagnosis of vascular dementia and then bladder cancer.
I stepped away from work for a year, returned for six months, and then resigned from the ‘big’ corporate job in 2017. Dad passed in January 2020. Shortly after his funeral, we moved to another rollercoaster— treatment for my mother’s two cancers.
Today, we count our blessings and savour the quality moments of today.
Gentle shifts
How are you feeling today? If you’re feeling discombobulated or out of sync, I see you; you’re human-ing, and it’s hard!
My last article, ‘Navigating Forward with Fear and Grief’, resonated with many of you. Thank you for your kind comments and support.
Ten Sparks of Inspiration
I hope this collection of articles, authors, music, and insights spark your interest in exploring them further.
1. ‘Renewal without the January stress.’ This was a timely insight from Carmen. Why the year doesn’t really start on January 1st Renewal without the January stress By
writes Rooted and Rested. (January 1, 2025)“Here’s a spoiler in the meantime: Great Britain and its American colonies didn’t even adopt the Gregorian calendar until 1752. Before that, New Year’s Day was celebrated on March 25, closer to the spring equinox- just as many cultures had done for centuries.”
2. Sarah reminded me that we have the potential to help each other through the hard days: '“You’ve made it through’ By
writes Sandwich Season (January 2, 2025)Oh, I get it, I told her. Piles of feelings returned to me as I recalled helping my parents transition from their home of 30-plus years to a one-bedroom apartment in a retirement community.
It seemed that this lovely woman next to me and her children were embarking on a similar journey.
I told her that it was wonderful to hear that she and her family are talking about the possibilities and making plans together.
Then I took out a piece of paper and started writing down my local contacts—names and numbers of people and businesses that had helped my parents and me walk through our process, those many months.
I expect some hard days are ahead for my seatmate and her family, but they too will make it through.
3. The 365 Grateful project is a beautifully simple yet powerful practice.
, who writes ‘This Caregiver’s Life’ shared her thoughts about 365Grateful, in this article last year: 'How can I feel happier or more grateful?' Enemies of gratitude and how to cultivate a habit to feel happier and more grateful.4.
makes an excellent point in this short article: It's Enough To Come As You Are On knowing what we want and getting to the mat. She writes ‘A Wilder Wonder.’When I take a yoga class, the teacher often tells us that we have done the important part: We have made it to the mat. Most of the resistance and obstacles we face come before we actually GET to the practice. Once we’re there, we just need to stay present and listen to our bodies.
If you haven’t met Jes, she’s a professional musician and printmaker. On the ‘About’ page of her Newsletter she writes:
A Wilder Wonder is an untamed combination of curiosity and awe. It's for the wide eyed and the tender, who know in their bones the invisible threads that tie the mundane to the ecstatic. This is where we open ourselves to the mythic and the mystic in our day to day lives through the transformative power of creative practice. We take off our masks and let our wonder run wild.
5. I discovered the music of ‘Above and Beyond’ (click here for the Spotify link.) I listened to this playlist on January 7th—a gentle shift in energy. I turned to read this…
6. ’s article: “My word for the year and why it matters. My annual visioning and inquiry at the end of 2024 and cusp of 2025 landed on the word "discovery," a process I invite you to explore for finding your own north star.“ (January 7, 2025). Amy writes ‘Living in 3D.’
As I listened to the music, I read the heart-swelling news about her relocation to Barcelona—tinged with nostalgic envy as I remembered what it’s like to move somewhere new, explore, and be in mainland Europe. A guided meditation started play by Elena Brower (made in 2019):
I downloaded the playlist and returned to Amy’s article, where she writes:
“I took part in the Reflection/Direction for What’s Next workshop offered by the ever-wise and gentle soul and teacher Elena Brower and coach Michelle Martello. It is a 2025 planning guide that participants are invited to revisit throughout the year, in conversation with Elena and Michelle. One question Michelle posed I cannot get out of my mind, a shift in our typically glass-half-empty thinking:
What’s the best that could happen?
A sign, or a simple coincidence? I’m exploring Above and Beyond’s music, Elena’s guided medications and her newsletter. Thanks
!7. ..and Elena is on this Substack platform. ‘Holding Nothing with Elena Brower.
“Dedicated to practice, study and listening, weekly writings offer humble insights on how to live this life with care and presence.”
8. In this article by Emma, I felt the messy human-ness the vulnerability and bravery. Uncertainty, heartache, and hope Farewell to 2024: a year of bittersweet endings and beginnings By writes ‘Am I Cured Yet?
I know it’s OK to feel sad. I know that, sometimes, it’s OK just to give in and go back to bed. I’ve done that a few times this week. But I also know that doing the things I love—even when I don’t feel the slightest bit like doing them—is often what I need.
So, yes, I’m writing. And I’m filling out my journal. And I’m taking all the time I want to read books that awaken my soul. Because I have hope that by going through the motions, I’ll start to feel better.
And maybe that’s my goal for the year—to give myself grace when I need it while continuing to challenge myself to keep showing up.
Compassionate human-ing, words, all the more courageous when you know more about Emma’s journey: after the breast cancer diagnosis of her best friend, Emily, Emma sought medical help for a lump she found in her breast. In 2018, at the age of 29 she was diagnosed with a highly aggressive invasive ductal carcinoma.
I recommend reading more about Emma and her best friend Emily here. This is what Emma says today:
Six years later, I’ve learned a powerful truth: writing isn’t about being perfect. It’s about showing up, day after day, and telling your story—even when you’re somewhere in the middle—a painful work in progress.
Writing is a lot like this thing called ‘life.’
9. A Full Plate with Jeannie Moloo. Jeannie recently subscribed to Carer Mentor and I’ve been exploring her publication. Several articles resonated. Here’s an excerpt from her Newsletter’s About page:
‘I teach college students about food and nutrition with a PhD in Preventive Medicine and Environmental Health, Master’s in Human Nutrition, registered dietitian, and mom. For 12 years, I was also a caregiver helping my husband navigate relentless nonHodgkin’s lymphoma treatments, including an immune stem cell transplant. My journey has been shaped by resilience and love, raising three incredible children who were three weeks from being born to ages 4 and 6, when cancer became a part of our lives and turned my family’s world upside down.
In 2014, I became a widow and solo parent when my youngest was 12, and my older two were ages 16 and 18. Shortly after, I was diagnosed with breast cancer and worried about the impact my new diagnosis would have on my children’s well being.
Jeannie shares the context of her 2024 articles, in a flowing narrative: Realities and Resilience Inspiration for the Journey Ahead (January 9, 2025)
‘When I launched this Substack, my goal was simple: to share honest, heartfelt stories about navigating caregiving and parenting during cancer treatments, exploring the nuances of widowhood, and raising children as a solo parent. Each article has aimed to shed light on the realities of these experiences while hopefully offering support and inspiration to those walking a similar path and for those supporting them.’
“Top 5 Insights from 25 Books on How to Find Purpose” By Nathan Lozeron.
Several years ago, I subscribed to Nathan Lozeron’s YouTube channel. He condenses complex concepts/books into bitesize information. Useful ‘leads’ to discover new ideas or books to dive into.
This video offers an introduction to several books and suggests some prompts to ponder your purpose. He highlights, 2 books that have stayed on my Annual re-read list since I read them:
Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl
How Will You Measure Your Life? by Clayton M. Christensen
A few of the other books he mentions in the video: The War of Art by Steven Pressfield, Mastery by Robert Greene, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*** by Mark Manson and Find Your Why by Simon Sinek
I’m sending warm wishes to you and your loved ones.
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Thank you dear readers for all your support. Spread the word wherever you can. Networking Empathy and Inspiration is needed more than ever these days. Thank you!
Victoria! Thank you so much for the generous recommendation!
Victoria, thank you so much for including me on this wonderful list of inspiring authors! I am so honoured. I have great respect for the work and writing you're doing here on Substack, so to know that my piece moved you in return is wonderful. I look forward to diving more into these other suggestions you've made!
I love that you read Man's Search for Meaning annually. I read that book when I was in treatment, and it really changed my outlook on life. I must aim to re-read it! I also recently purchased The War of Art, so that might have to be my next read!
Thank you so much for all you're doing for the cancer community! xx