'Who started Carer Mentor, and Why?'
'Who started Carer Mentor, and Why?'
June 2024.
‘Heartfelt empathy for Caregivers. A hub of practical tools, resources, and expert insights. A portal of hope.’
Hi! I'm Victoria. I’m a Caregiver to my mother, a Mentor to clients seeking support along their career-life journeys, and an Advocate of carers.
Why I’m here:
The Premise - my rollercoaster journey,
The Mission
Carer Mentor Website Offering
The Positive Feedback & Affirmation I need to keep going!
The Premise
The rollercoaster image below shows my career growth and the seismic shifts and jolts of being a caregiver. This is a subjective rating of my life-events built using the Timeline Exercise.
Victoria’s Timeline. Rating of Events 1988 to 2023.
Along this journey, I've navigated 18 relocations across 10 countries and led cross-functional diverse global teams and portfolios. I had no idea that from 2015 onwards, I would experience such a seismic ‘amplitude of emotions’ whose intensity and impact stretched me beyond what I thought I was capable of.
It's been an extreme challenge—the acts of caregiving and orchestrating all the connecting elements. We are the orchestra, the sheet music, and all the instruments. We are the conductor, but we have no baton.
I count my blessings and know I am in calmer waters. Others are not. They are tired and have no time to advocate for change. They need empathy and support. When those who need support are too tired to lobby for themselves, we must stand for them.
The Mission
Together, we can raise awareness of the struggles Caregivers face today and the impact that the hidden crisis of Care is having on ALL of us.
Whether you are a caregiver today or someone navigating life’s challenges and uncertainties, the resources and experiences I share could offer Empathy and Inspiration for your journey ahead.
Context: As the population ages, a whole new generation is added to our lifespan - an ageing population, a ‘5 generation’ workplace’/economy & a ‘Sandwich generation’ that is burning out. (see Interview Chris Hayes Podcast with Ai-jen PooExec Director of Caring Across Generations in the US).
The Problem: an increased need for care has outpaced the change in policies and infrastructure. There is a hidden crisis as caregivers struggle to do everything themselves; long battles with bureaucracy and complicated access to care support exhaust whatever energy remains after working. This is compounded by the fact that everyone’s trying to make ends meet financially. So, conversations are ‘put off’, and denial and discomfort simmer until a medical crisis occurs.
How do we improve the situation and match the needs of the growing, ageing population? How do we care for our loved ones today, and who’ll look after us later? There is a collective social need for change.
The Idea: We can start by changing the narrative around care and caregiving - let’s start having more discussions within our families and with others and creating solutions in our communities. While I hope we can advocate for changes in policy and with governments, I’ve seen the most powerful, effective solutions being made between 2 or 3 people sharing daily tasks and errands. E.g. shopping, collecting medications, making meals for others, and driving to medical appointments.
We can redefine care and caregiving in our communities: one cup of tea/coffee, one errand, one conversation at a time. Define Your care team. Build your Caring Community.
We can support each other, leveraging our experience for peer-to-peer mentoring, empathy and inspiration. Let’s be neighbours and friends who support each other.
Carer Mentor Website
This website's priority is to focus on the needs and experiences of being a caregiver first and caregiving and its context second. Both aspects are underappreciated, unseen and misunderstood by many.
I’m sharing all the resources I’ve discovered and recommend to others in the hope they can serve others.
4 libraries and a community space for easy access.
Resonance for Caregivers: a Network of Empathy is a growing library of articles by myself and others, curated into different facets and phases of caregiving.
For those on the cusp of Caregiving and to raise awareness of the crisis we face today: The CAPE: Care be Aware, Prepare and Engage
The Carer Mentor Journey is where I share my story and journey. My frame of reference has changed immeasurably, but my purpose is crystal clear.
The Mentoring section offers 'A Portal to Expert Insights Through a Caregiver Lens.' Research-based insights to inform your way forward. The ideas and inspiration from these experts have reframed my thinking. As a curious learner I needed new reference points in the absence of support. I leverage my mentoring approach with business clients e.g. The Timeline Exercise and Framework., Disruptions happen at any age, not confined or clumped around mid-life. (Watch Bruce Feiler’s TEDx talk)
An evolving community space—Nexus. This is where I share articles from other writers on this platform. A go to Hub of resources, and a Portal to connect you to others.
The Positive Feedback & Affirmation I need to keep going!
A small review affirmed the purpose:
55 Publications are Recommending Carer Mentor. Here are some comments:
'Resources for caregivers and an understanding of the political and economic realities facing those needing, and those providing care in our society.' 'This newsletter is such a gift to all people who give care to loved ones.' 'An in-depth resource for those of us in the caregiver role, at whatever stage.' 'If you love someone you will be a carer' is so true. For some of us it will be a blessedly short experience for others it is a lifetime. Victoria's substack offers exactly what the title suggests and is a great resource for anyone in this position.' 'Victoria is dedicated to honest, hope-fuelled caregiver support and resources. Her portal is wonderful respite for so many!' 'Carer Mentor makes me think, gives me hope, and provides info that I may desperately need some day. Thank you, Victoria!' 'Victoria offers so much to those of us caregiving for others. She's a wonderful resource.' 'Victoria writes heartwarming and insightful pieces about what it's like to be a caregiver. She highlights the struggles caregivers face as well as what an important and often under appreciated role they play.' at ‘Lots of resources, food for thought and empathy here!’I am deeply grateful to the 14 people supporting me with paid subscriptions.
THANK YOU! Time is my most precious asset, and your support of the Carer Mentor Mission and my work means more than I can say.
Carer Mentor by Victoria is free to read. If you have the means and would like to support me, I welcome monthly (£6) and annual (£50) subscriptions. Thank you for your ongoing support.
Please ‘❤️’ LIKE the article
Glad we met over on Smallstack Victoria. This is great work you are doing here. I look forward to receiving your posts now I’ve subscribed! 💖
Victoria, what you are doing is so important. Thank you for all you do for the caregivers' community.