Sally - I need you to know that 2 Timothy 1:7 is etched to memory and I've been using that scripture every single time I am going through a challenge. Loved reading this!
Mine - sometimes the best thing you can do when you love someone this much is to have an open conversation, and share that you want to be there for her. I hear you. Talk to her. I'm sorry you're so worried. If she knows how worried you are maybe you can both agree on what's best as next steps together.
Please be aware that Sally and I may not be able to respond to messages.
thats ok Victoria, I can only communicate with you girls in here, giving me advice. It's my beautiful mommy who will respond back, I know sheāll figure it out she's a genius.
Wow, my emotions while reading this went from tears to anger! Sally, there is no one on this earth, not one single person, that your dad would've rather had as a CG than YOU. And there is no other CG in the world that would've loved him as much as you. Family members are "perfectly imperfect" for the job. Although we may not have the formal training for X, Y, and Z, there is no one else that that could love our loved ones better. You did a phenomenal job. And quite honestly, I think the same way about my homeschooling. I could've done things better, for sure, but no one on earth loved my chiddlers more than me, and that's what matters most!
I want to reiterate these words to you:
The sacrifice, the tiredness, the worry, the anguish, the grief are all worth it, because you loved him with your whole heart. You served him and honoured him. You were a gift to him. And this was his gift to you.
Know this. You didnāt fail him. You loved him. By the end, you were all he knew. And he was safe with you.
my mom needs at least some years of consuelo CARE and just relaxing sessions since there's been some events on her life and I wanna be part of this time in her life, we only have each otherās hands now. Donāt know how to address it since she has all the means, and maybe sheās comfortable like that. dunno. but I truly feel like max support and care would come good.
Oh wow Sally, that really hit home for me, you're right we're not kind to ourselves when we go through the caring role, the guilt, the lack of support, but you passed that love test a long time ago, you came home, you put your life on hold, you dealt with those difficult nights, you were there when your dad needed (not asked) for your love at the hardest time of his life. Unconditional, selfless love, like your parents gave you, you gave back whilst the system did nothing to help but question. Be kind to yourself, i so agree with this 'Sally', i read somewhere about the guilt we feel about not doing the right thing or enough is because we care, its so true, if we didn't love the person, we wouldn't have had those feelings of guilt, it wouldn't even cross your mind. So thank you for sharing your story, it made me cry, I'm so sorry that your dad has passed, but he would've been, is, I'm sure so proud of you.
Bless you, Khadra. Thank you for the lovely words. Are you in a caregiving role right now? If so, I hope you donāt beat yourself up like I did! Like you say, we do this for them, just as they did for us when we were wee babes. Take care š
Oh Sally, I hold you in my heart over your Dad's passing. Your first paragraph on extending yourself grace moved me to tears. Why are we so hard on ourselves when all we are doing is caring and flowing unconditional love? And as Victoria says, being the bridge between our loved ones and the medical/care system. An advocate for our loved ones. Returning to care for your Dad was a loving choice. You are loving grace in action. I pray you can gift yourself the same loving grace now. Sending you lots of love, Sally. ā¤ļø And to Victoria for sharing. ā¤ļø
Jane, thank you so much for your beautiful message. Writing this article brought me much healing, I have to say. I can be my own worst enemy sometimes and I have promised myself not to do that anymore. I felt the need to share because I know itās a trap so many of us fall into. Your words of comfort and support mean more than you know. Blessings to you. š
Sally - I need you to know that 2 Timothy 1:7 is etched to memory and I've been using that scripture every single time I am going through a challenge. Loved reading this!
Amen! Iām so glad it was helpful. š
Beautiful love letter to both yourself and your father Sally šš¾
Thank you, Haley. It came straight from the heart.
I mean as long as sheās happy Iām to
Maybe sheās just very busy with her girlfriends, they are always there sipping tea
I love her so much
I wanna be inside her house and care for her but I dont even dare to ask her for a plane ticket again...
Mine - sometimes the best thing you can do when you love someone this much is to have an open conversation, and share that you want to be there for her. I hear you. Talk to her. I'm sorry you're so worried. If she knows how worried you are maybe you can both agree on what's best as next steps together.
Please be aware that Sally and I may not be able to respond to messages.
Take care.
thats ok Victoria, I can only communicate with you girls in here, giving me advice. It's my beautiful mommy who will respond back, I know sheāll figure it out she's a genius.
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL THE LOVE
Wow, my emotions while reading this went from tears to anger! Sally, there is no one on this earth, not one single person, that your dad would've rather had as a CG than YOU. And there is no other CG in the world that would've loved him as much as you. Family members are "perfectly imperfect" for the job. Although we may not have the formal training for X, Y, and Z, there is no one else that that could love our loved ones better. You did a phenomenal job. And quite honestly, I think the same way about my homeschooling. I could've done things better, for sure, but no one on earth loved my chiddlers more than me, and that's what matters most!
I want to reiterate these words to you:
The sacrifice, the tiredness, the worry, the anguish, the grief are all worth it, because you loved him with your whole heart. You served him and honoured him. You were a gift to him. And this was his gift to you.
Know this. You didnāt fail him. You loved him. By the end, you were all he knew. And he was safe with you.
I love you, dear Sally. xo
Love you too, dear friend. Couldnāt have said it better myself! šš
my mom needs at least some years of consuelo CARE and just relaxing sessions since there's been some events on her life and I wanna be part of this time in her life, we only have each otherās hands now. Donāt know how to address it since she has all the means, and maybe sheās comfortable like that. dunno. but I truly feel like max support and care would come good.
Iām sure she will appreciate you being there for her. ā¤ļø
yes but how can I tell her?
Ā°āā.ą³ąæ*:ļ½„Ā°āā.ą³ąæ*:ļ½„YOU DAMN RIGTH Ā°āā.ą³ąæ*:ļ½„Ā°āā.ą³ąæ*:ļ½„
Loved the āthree qualitiesā that you admire. These are important strengths. Superpowers. Loved this. š
What a good way of describing them: superpowers. I love that!
Oh wow Sally, that really hit home for me, you're right we're not kind to ourselves when we go through the caring role, the guilt, the lack of support, but you passed that love test a long time ago, you came home, you put your life on hold, you dealt with those difficult nights, you were there when your dad needed (not asked) for your love at the hardest time of his life. Unconditional, selfless love, like your parents gave you, you gave back whilst the system did nothing to help but question. Be kind to yourself, i so agree with this 'Sally', i read somewhere about the guilt we feel about not doing the right thing or enough is because we care, its so true, if we didn't love the person, we wouldn't have had those feelings of guilt, it wouldn't even cross your mind. So thank you for sharing your story, it made me cry, I'm so sorry that your dad has passed, but he would've been, is, I'm sure so proud of you.
Bless you, Khadra. Thank you for the lovely words. Are you in a caregiving role right now? If so, I hope you donāt beat yourself up like I did! Like you say, we do this for them, just as they did for us when we were wee babes. Take care š
Oh Sally, I hold you in my heart over your Dad's passing. Your first paragraph on extending yourself grace moved me to tears. Why are we so hard on ourselves when all we are doing is caring and flowing unconditional love? And as Victoria says, being the bridge between our loved ones and the medical/care system. An advocate for our loved ones. Returning to care for your Dad was a loving choice. You are loving grace in action. I pray you can gift yourself the same loving grace now. Sending you lots of love, Sally. ā¤ļø And to Victoria for sharing. ā¤ļø
Jane, thank you so much for your beautiful message. Writing this article brought me much healing, I have to say. I can be my own worst enemy sometimes and I have promised myself not to do that anymore. I felt the need to share because I know itās a trap so many of us fall into. Your words of comfort and support mean more than you know. Blessings to you. š
ā¤ļø Sally ā¤ļø