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Dad Lives with Me's avatar

My grandpa was diagnosed with dementia in 2000, but the doctor didn’t tell us much more than that, and no one knew what to ask. That’s why I’m such an advocate for caregivers asking questions and learning as much as they can about their loved one’s diagnosis. We navigated everything on our own until hospice joined us. He passed away a month later in 2005. Now I know he should have been diagnosed much earlier, but his confusion was said to be from hearing loss. Now we know that hearing loss is a contributor to dementia and often a misdiagnosis of dementia.

Vance Frost's avatar

Victoria, what you wrote about your dad. How everything started unraveling after the hospital. He spoke how many languages, and that's what goes first. Brutal.

Vascular dementia after that kind of hospitalisation, it's not what anybody reaches for first. Everyone's chasing the heart, the kidneys, checking for cancer, you know, the usual circuit. Meanwhile the mind dimming sits there quiet, until something actually breaks. By the time someone finally hands you a diagnosis, you've already spent months wrestling with the whole thing on your own. No paperwork. Just you and it.

Which is why Dementia Action Week lands funny this year. NHS quietly chucked the dementia diagnosis target out of last year's planning. Wait times from referral are 151 days now, up from 124. Some regions people are stuck for nearly a year. The campaign pushed more people through the GP door, fine. And then? The queue behind that door hasn't moved. In some places it's longer.

But your dad got to stay home. That's not nothing.

Bittersweet joy, like you wrote. Yeah.

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