Resource: 'RSA Animation of Brené Brown's Connecting with Empathy'

Video Animation

These are the Key Learnings I noted that guide me every day:

Empathy FUELS connection. Sympathy DRIVES disconnection

Nursing scholar, Dr. Teresa Wiseman (A Concept Analysis of Empathy, June 1996. Journal of Advanced Nursing) identified four attributes of empathy. I'm reframing them based on the video, so that we can constructively, put them into action immediately.

1. Perspective-taking is the ability to take on the perspective of the other person. This is their lens, their truth.

2. Stay away from judgment. It's humanly hard to do, but hold it back. You have your own thoughts, biases and interpretations which are separate and you. Focus on them

3. Recognize and understand the emotion that the other person is feeling. It's about them and not you.

4. Communicate your understanding of the person's feelings. It's important to validate someone’s feelings because it demonstrates that you accept, acknowledge, and understand them.

You are in their 'sacred space', say 'you're not alone'. Stepping into that sacred space with that person, is a vulnerable choice on your part because you have to connect with something in yourself that knows that feeling

Don't silverline the situation or try to make things better. Perhaps it’s YOU who doesn't like to be in that uncomfortable place, but sitting together in pain fuels a deep connection.

It's good to say 'I don't even know what to say right now but I'm so glad you told me' instead of giving me Clichés or trying to push me to be positive, FOR YOU.

Rarely does a response make things better. What makes things better is Connection.

Voice: Dr Brené Brown Animation: Katy Davis (AKA Gobblynne) www.gobblynne.com Production and Editing: Al Francis-Sears,  Abi Stephenson 

Brené Brown, research professor, University of Houston and bestselling author of Daring Greatly: How the Courage to be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent and Lead" (Penguin Portfolio, 2013).