Poem: 'Being there for a new Carer's angst.'

Empathetic pains and reality bites. Written by Victoria Chin

Dear Friend
I’m here to tell you I hear you beating with earnest thumps
to imprint a footprint on what must be
Feelings of fear, scared cold, imprisoned not free
I feel your angst, anxiety to try to make others see
When you feel you’re in the dark, broken, and insignificant, downsized to a pea.

But we’re here, together, you’re not alone
Other Carers feel empathy and see your plight
caught between the care and urge to fight
you’ve only finite time, energy and waking hours
but together, don’t worry they’ll feel our power

So much system, pathways and boxes to tick
yet on this side of the fence the humanity seems missed.
Questionnaires, and assessments mean we’re trying to fit a slot
that squeezes and remoulds to something we’re not
Square peg round hole and no bespoke solutions
gives rise to feelings that there’s something broken
and first we think it must be us
because surely the system is meant to give us some support, care and trust?

But from the moment a crisis for a loved one happens
we’ve no space, time or energy to navigate
all the things, the ‘system’ wants us to do
we’re told, we’re pushed, we’re meant to sit in a queue
So many things get forfeited before we know what we’re owed
because our focus is on our loved one’s crisis taking hold

And also, can I just say, like many others in life
We say to ourselves ‘there are others who are suffering a MUCH bigger plight’
whether that’s money or in need of helping hands
We self-abdicate our power, defer our needs, and don’t take a stand.

And bigger than all that my biggest need and prayer
Is to get enough sleep yes it IS that bland
Because until your stretched beyond belief
everything else seems very insignificant and cheap

So Dear Friend, you’re not alone
we feel your heart and hear the same mournful song.
We see your fight …to just keep going without enough sleep
running running running - whilst your heart breaks and freaks.
Connect and vent and shout and scream
You’re worth-it, head and heart, hands open
We’re here for you and YOU are well and truly seen